The real revenge of Jaws: Jaws 5

If you thought the Jaws franchise finished with Michael Caine joining up with Chief Brody’s wife to finally put an end to the  Brody/Bruce(do sharks have last names? Bruce Jaws maybe? The Jaws’?) conflict, you’d be right, and that’s actually quite a good thing. After Jaws 4: The Revenge, the series slipped beneath the waves to be buried where it should of because, well it was just getting silly. The shit they make you swallow in number 4 is just so ridiculous, it’s laughable. What was once a film that awoke a dormant fear in everyone that saw it, turned into an interspecies blood feud that I guess can only be compared to something akin to a Jeremy Kyle episode? Continue reading “The real revenge of Jaws: Jaws 5”


A love letter to IT (2017) part 1: From Book to Film

Whenever Gordon Ramsay likes a dish, his go to saying is, ‘wowowow’. This trifecta of awe is a simply yet effective way of expressing, to me at least, that he approves of the ingredients, the way the food looks on the plate, and the way it tastes. The reason I bring this up is because I can think of no more fitting expression to summarise my thoughts on the new adaptation of, in my opinion, Stephen King’s best work – if I were to do it briefly that is. Continue reading “A love letter to IT (2017) part 1: From Book to Film”

Bitter Bastard: Alien:Covenant

When you’re a film lover, one of the best things is to love something you watch. You get to end credits and you feel like you’ve just had a big glass of some refreshing fruit juice that leaves an exquisite taste in your mouth. That said, it can also be really fun to hate things too. But then, there are other times, when hating on a film is fun wasteland, and that’s when you get to the end credits and feel bitterly disappointed. And that, I’m sad to say, is where I place my thoughts on Alien: Covenant.  Continue reading “Bitter Bastard: Alien:Covenant”

What Could’ve Been: Hostel

If you’ve ever seen, or even heard of Eli Roth’s pretty notorious film series, Hostel, you know that they’re pretty simplistic films. A lot of critics and movie-goers alike believe these films to have pretty much single-handedly created the badge of shame on films that have followed their footsteps, in the term, ‘torture porn’. And while I don’t think that they really deserve such harsh finger pointing, it’s hard to find anything of real substance in such shallow films.

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How to do a Spin-off Right: Better Call Saul

Briefly returning to what I was saying about Rogue One: A Star Wars Story,you can hardly attack what is a great attempt at a spin-off because any spin-off media is a difficult task. It requires a delicate chemistry of known elements, and other, more dangerous yet daring elements that can elevate something that’s well loved; believed to have soared as high as it could, only to rise higher. And it’s a darn rare thing that one might come along and actually fulfill that kind of prophecy. A spin-off either works, or it doesn’t – the recipe for making one doesn’t really allow for any middle ground. That’s why, it’s always good to get talking about those brave few, that have expanded a universe, and have created something truly quite wonderful. Continue reading “How to do a Spin-off Right: Better Call Saul”

What Went Wrong with Rogue One

There’s no doubt in my mind that Rogue One: A Star Wars story will continue to dominate conversation topics across the world for some time now, and I say, let it be so. I know from the title of this article that it sounds like I’m about to start giving a Star Wars film shit that isn’t The Phantom Menace, but don’t worry, I’m not completely insane – I actually quite liked Rogue One. Overall, it was a decent film, I mean, it wasn’t The Force Awakens by any stretch, but it certainly wasn’t on the level of ‘I’ll try spinning, that’s a good trick’ or ‘I hate sand’ kind of Star Wars we’ve seen – and even those, I can’t say I really hate.

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Great Christmas Films that Aren’t Really Christmas Films

Everyone has a favourite Christmas film – everyone. There is anyone in the civilized world celebrating the holiday, that hasn’t got a choice for the one festive film that really warms their Christmas cockles. We put our feet up, drink something warm and sit in the glow of a beautifully lit tree; it’s something I look forward to every year. Pure and simply, Christmas is great, and so are Christmas films because they show us just how great Christmas is.

Continue reading “Great Christmas Films that Aren’t Really Christmas Films”